1. Dowse for the best movie studio and theatrical agent. Sign with the Agent.
2. Telepathically induce a trance into the studio head.
3. Induct a phone call from studio head to your agent.
4. Telepathically suggest the terms of contract to favor you and your family.
5. Sign the contract when it comes.
6. Refuse to show up for work. This will convince the studio that you're a professional actor or actress and will get you going in the tabloids.
7. Lose your passport, get totally ripped, cheat on your life-partner, get yourself slugged by someone, preferably your partner, then call in a 911 to the local police, make sure the recorded message gets to CNN, admit to whatever you're accused of, then merely put yourself in rehab for a few days and wait for further results.
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